Horror 365 Movie 363: Full Moon Friday, Seedpeople

This one’s been on the ol’ watchlist for some time, even before Full Moon Friday was Full Moon Friday. This is some more classic Full Moon horror that’s actual horror without playing the story for barnyard humor and sophomoric gags or otherwise pandering to the dudebro-y gratuitous boobs and sex scenes crowd.

No this is straight up creature feature monster mayhem, the kinda stuff that’s more along the lines of Laserblast, Parasite, Puppet Master, From Beyond, Castle Freak, stuff like that.

We start off in a hospital where raving, head-bandaged geologist Tom Baines is strapped to a bed and being sedated by a doctor. I’m no medical professional, but is sedation something they do if you have a head wound? I thought you weren’t supposed to sleep if you have a concussion. But I digress.

Cue Agent Weems from the FBI. He wants to know what’s goin’ on. The majority of the movie is basically an extended flashback as Tom relates the story of what has befallen the cleverly monikered Comet Valley, so named for the meteor (not comet) that apparently landed there 500 years ago.

Tom shows up to give a talk about all this to a local meteor club or something like that. Oh, those small towns and their astronomy buffs. The hijinks they get up to .

We also meet Kim, the daughter of Tom’s ex, Heidi who runs the bed and breakfast Tom just happens to be staying at. Kim already suspects that there’s weird shit goin’ on and is miighty suspicious of the housekeeper Mrs. Santiago. So, Kim sets to investigatin’ armed with her trusty 90s-style VHS camcorder.

Well it turns out that the meteor is really a big ol’ seed carrier, and people are being turned into various types of plant monsters of which there are currently 3.

One, shocking nobody, is Mrs. Santiago. She can change at will into a tumbleweed-sized Critters-type ball that rolls toward its victims then basically opens up and goes “Boo, chomp!” Another is Kim’s father Frank. He can become this thing that inefficiently shuffles about with its two arms kinda like Lon Chaney in The Penalty. The last one is some random flying thing (with no wings) that looks like a giant flea with the head of a wolf spider.

Somehow these things are also able hypnotize the local populace. Slowly. One by one. It’s not clear why, after 500 years, they’ve decided to do this now despite the fact that a cave painting in the vicinity explains the arrival of these things in the first place. Oh well.

If you’re wondering why unflinching rock-jock doesn’t just round up Heidi and Kim and make a break for it, it just so happens there’s only one road into Comet Valley y’see. And it has a bridge. And the bridge is closed for 3 days for repairs apparently rendering said bridge completely impassable for 3 days. What ever shall our plucky band do?

Fortunately, according to the alcohol-fueled ramblings of ol’ Doc Roller, the judicious use of herbicide and UV light can put a stop to all this. Oh, and UV light can also snap one out of the aforementioned hypnotic trance. And so, the climax. A bunch of hip-moe-tized townsfolk start loadin’ seeds into the back of a truck whilst Tom and the doc try to save everyone. It’s all very Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (mainly 1956 as opposed to the good one from 1978).

This is, in fact, fairly derivative stuff overall, and not just from Invasion Of The Body Snatchers and Critters. The fact that nobody believes Kim is straight outta The Blob. Hell, while we’re at it, let’s throw in a little Matango and Day Of The Triffids also too as well. None of this is necessarily a bad thing and does not at all detract from Seedpeople’s sheer Saturday afternoon escapist sci-fi/horror schlock factor appeal.

 BODIES- 3 (including 1 monster) onscreen, 1 drunk scientist offscreen
 Streaming- Full Moon, Pluto, Tubi
 Rent- Prime

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